12/9/2020 0 Comments
This Is Not the End by Sidney Bell
This is the first fully polyamorous love story that I’ve read, so before starting reading, I was a bit nervous what I’d might think of it. But I absolutely LOVED this adorable and sweet book! There was nothing of the over-the-top drama, playing games or even cheating that I’d worried about. Instead, this was such a beautiful story about a loving relationship with respect for all parties involved, and about finding the courage to be true to yourself and allow yourself love and happiness even if it doesn’t come in the most ordinary way.
I read this wonderful book in one sitting, completely falling in love with the story and the writing style. I really loved the pacing, the slow and amazing build of the characters and all emotions.
Rock star Zac and former model Anya are happily married with a beautiful son, but living a life that is not too far from their previous hedonistic ones. They enjoy partying and occasionally to pick up men for threesomes. But they are always fiercely loyal to each other and their family, never letting any of the men they bring home actually mean anything to them. Not until Anya starts to feel attracted to Zac’s best friend and band mate Cal. Zac’s friendship with Cal is the foundation of his career and, next to Anya, Cal has always been the most important relationship in his life. So when Anya’s idea grows into desire for Zac as well, it puts every bond that exists between them at risk.
I rooted so for all three characters. Anya was such a strong and badass female lead. I loved how she always spoke her mind and didn’t let motherhood stop her ambition, but how she always managed to put family first nevertheless. And Zac was such a fun, but sweet, bad boy. But the character that completely stole my heart was Cal. He was one of those troubled characters that I just couldn’t help but love. He’s a recovering alcoholic, with so many hidden thoughts and desires. He’s loved Zac since the first time he’d met him, but never allowed himself to let Zac know the depth of his feelings. Not until Zac gives him permission to make love to his wife… when Zac and Anya for the first time have invited someone they care deeply about to share their bed, their home, and their life. Risking Zac’s and Cal’s friendship and career for the chance of a fulfilling relationship that re-defines what family and marriage means.
Sidney Bell made an amazing job explaining the depths of the feelings the three of them developed and showing how a loving relationship can be strong enough for three persons. The character developments, and how they all explored their relationship and themselves, their struggle to find the courage to open up completely to each other and, for Cal the struggle to accept who he really was, was so realistically and beautifully described. And even though the sex scenes were super steamy and more explicit than in the YA books I normally read, they were written in such a tender and sweet way, that it added so much to the story and never felt even close to awkward.
All in all, this is an adorable and deeply emotional novel that makes you question your way of looking at love and family. I felt that I learned about this new lifestyle alongside Cal and got so many new perspectives along the way. It really warmed my heart and I enjoyed reading it so much more than I’d ever dared to hope! I highly recommend it to anyone, especially if you love romance and complex characters and don’t care how many people are involved in a relationship or want to learn more about polyamorous love.
Thank you NetGalley and Carina Press for the opportunity to read this adorable book in exchange for an honest review!
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All 1 Star 2 Stars 3 Stars 4 Stars 5 Stars Abbi Glines Abdi Nazemian Adam Silvera Adib Khorram Aiden Thomas Aisha Saeed Aislinn Brophy AJ Collins Alexandra Christo Alex Beltran Alexene Farol Follmuth Alexis Hall Alex Kelly Alex Sanchez Alice Dolman Alice Oseman Ali Hazelwood Alison Cochrun Al Riske Alwyn Hamilton Amanda Ferreira A. Meredith Walters Amy Aislin Amy Harmon Amy S. Foster Amy Spalding André Aciman Andy V Roamer Angie Thomas Annabeth Albert A. Poland Ashley Poston Ashley Woodfolk Ashlyn Kane Audrey Coulthurst Becca Fitzpatrick Becky Albertalli Benjamin Alire Saenz Beth Bolden Bill Konigsberg B.L. Maxwell Briar Prescott Bri Spicer Brooke Skipstone Cale Dietrich Casey McQuiston Cassandra Clare C.F. White C.G. Drews Charli Meadows Chris Bedell Ciara Smyth Clarissa Pattern C.L. Beaumont Colette Davison Colleen Hoover Crystal Frasier C.S. Pacat Daven McQueen David Biddle David Yoon Dean Atta Debbie McGowan Debbie Rigaud Debbie Schrack Deborah Harkness Delia Owens D.G. Carothers Dhonielle Clayton Douglas Stuart Dustin Thao Elisa A. Bonnin Elizabeth Acevedo Elizabeth Arroyo Elle Kennedy Elle Wright E. Lockhart Emily M. Danforth Emily Mims Erin Watt Ernest Cline Evan J. Corbin Eve Morton Everina Maxwell Evie Dunmore Felice Stevens Grace Williams Gwen Martin Hanya Yanagihara Hayden Stone Heather Truett H.E. Edgmon Hettie Bell Holly Black Hope Irving Hudson Lin Ingrid Sterling Jacqueline Lee Jacqueline Woodson James L. Sutter Jamie Deacon Jandy Nelson Jax Calder Jay Hogan Jeanette Winterson Jeff Zentner Jen Bailey Jenna Evans Welch Jenn Burke Jennifer E. Smith Jennifer G. Edelson Jennifer Gilmore Jennifer Iacopelli Jennifer Kropf Jennifer Niven Jenny Downham Jenny Han Jeremy Ray Jesse H. Reign Joelle Lynne John Green Jonny Garza Villa Julianne Donaldson Julian Winters Kacen Callender Kami Garcia Kara Leigh Miller Kasie West Kate Larkindale Katharine McGee Kathleen Mareé KD Casey Kendall Grey Kevin Van Whye Kiley Reid Kim Fielding Kim Holden Kim Liggett Kitty Bardot Kris Ripper K.S. Marsden Laura Hall Laura Pavlov Laura Silverman Lauren James Laurie Frankel Leah Johnson Lee Matthew Goldberg Leigh Bardugo Leylah Attar Lisa Henry Lisa Williamson Lisa Wingate Liv Rancourt Liz Plum Lola Noire Lynn Michaels Mackenzi Lee Madeline Miller Magdalena Di Sotru Maggie Doolin Maggie Stiefvater Malin Persson Giolito Malorie Blackman Margaret Stohl Marie Lu Mary E. Pearson Mason Deaver Matthew R. Corr Melina Marchetta Meredith Russo Miel Moreland Mila Gray Miranda Kenneally Moa Backe Astot Morgan James M. Tasia Nancy Garden Natalie Haynes Nicholas Sparks Nicola Yoon Nic Starr Nic Stone Nina Kenwood Nita Tyndall Nora Sakavic N.R. Walker Owen Lach Penny Aimes Phil Stamper Quinn Anderson Rachael Brownell Rachael Lippincott Rachel Hawkins Rainbow Rowell Ray Stoeve Renée Dahlia Rhiannon Wilde Riley Hart River Braun Roan Parrish Robin Gow Roseanne A. Brown Rowan MacKemsley Ruby Moone Ruta Sepetys Ryan La Sala Sally Green Sally Rooney Sarah J. Maas Sarah Waters Sarina Bowen Sasha Laurens Saundra Mitchell Saxon James Serena Bell Shannon O’Connor Sidney Bell Simone Elkeles Siryn Sueng Sophia DeRise Sophia Soames Sophie Gonzales S.R. Lane Stephen Chbosky Stephenie Meyer Steven Salvatore Susan Mac Nicol Suzanne Collins Tahereh Mafi Tal Bauer Tamara Girardi Teagan Hunter Terry J. Benton-Walker Tiffany D. Jackson Timothy Janovsky T.J. Klune T.L. Bradford Tobly McSmith Tomasz Jedrowski Tomi Adeyemi Tracy Deonn Val Wise Veronica Rossi Veronica Roth V.E. Schwab Victor Dixen Victoria Aveyard V.L. Stuart Wesley Chu Xan Van Rooyen Yamile Saied Méndez